Scientists should study train wreck Lindsay Lohan in a lab, as she has found the secret to aging, regarding accelerating it through hard living. Lohan has no known genetic disorder causing this, but should serve as a warning to preteens and teens of what happens when you party all the time and abuse drugs and alcohol. 

Lohan claims she is on the comeback trail, but she has not changed. She is just trying to pretend for the public and press, while getting up to her usual stunts in Hollywood circles. Directors and producers are also still wary of hiring her, lest she destroys their films with her crazy antics and tardiness.

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